When I was 7, I had heard the Sunday school teacher at the church we would sometimes attend tell us that if we ask Jesus into our hearts we can someday go to Heaven. So, that night I sat up in bed with my teddy bear and asked Jesus into my heart. But it would be years before I understood what being a Christ follower was really all about.
I grew up in a family that appeared to have everything. But we had a big secret. There was a lot of hurt at home. By the time I was 12 my parents decided to get a divorce. A little while after my parents separated my dad was killed in a car accident, and my world came to a screeching halt. It was then that I clearly heard God say to me, “I’m your Daddy now.” And He has been! I walked through my teen years loving God the best I knew how. But looking back, I was like the infant in Ephesians 4:14: “tossed back and forth by the waves…”
I would read my Bible and Bible Study books to learn more and grow more, but now I see how even so much of this was with an “all about me” mentality. Last year I read a book called “Surrender” by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. In that book, Nancy talks about how the word servant in the New Testament of our Bibles is actually the Greek word doulos meaning “slave.” She goes into detail about how if God is the Master of our lives, He has total control over us. This takes a total surrender of our own will.
I see so clearly now, that last year was the first time I truly committed my life to Christ. I loved God very much but hadn’t given up complete control in my life and didn’t even know it. I hadn’t decided to truly follow Him and trust Him no matter what. Last year I chose to let Him be in charge of me! And He is so much better at it than I ever was!